Select Category » Fighting, Arguing and Bickering » No talking back

Name: Michelle R   Title: No talking back

Whenever I argue with my husband and he does not respond this infuriates me even more. How can I get some sort of response from him. I am at my wits end.

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Name: Hollie

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Name: Mw

I also agree with Gunther.... its about the tone and listening to each other. Sometimes we just hear. Listening is really trying to understand what one is saying with their heart factored. The tone and really listening is key! If your listening to him, he will eventually show you the same courtesy.

Name: Mw

Definitely evaluate how your coming across. We all argue. There is an appropriate time and place to discuss things. It shouldn't be when we're not at our best, tired etc. That sets ourselves up for failure. It needs to be constructive and respectful. Your really communicating your heart with the best interests of both and your marriage at the forefront. We all have a tendency to not listen especially when we get our feelings hurt. We all either shut down (flight) or fight. Make sure your really putting forth the effort to resolve matters, not trying to wound one another or trying to simply be "right" or "win". Misunderstandings happen so quickly. Ask him what he heard when you said...?. Make sure your both on the same page. You both know that you value each other and what you both have to say. Its ok also to discuss something later when you've had more time to think about it, not tired etc. Just make sure you plan on when you'll discuss it and it doesn't get forgotten about if its that important. Resentment is a top killer of marriages and forgiveness is the best remedy for all.

Name: Kristi

Hi, I have the same problem with my husband and I am almost at my wits end. My husband says he won't say anything back because he is scared it will make things worse. If you find the answer please let me know.

Name: Gunther

You are arguing with your husband no wonder he isn’t listening. You can talk all you want, but unless he is listening, communication cannot and will not take place. Conversing is a two-way process one person “serves” and the other sends it back. If one person holds the ball then there is no interaction and you might as well have kept the ball to yourself. If your husband is not responding to you, it could be that you are approaching him in the wrong way. Try to find other ways to communication with him; the best time may be before you both go to bed try “pillow talk”. This is the time when your mind is relaxed and you can better open up with your feelings and have an honest discussion. If you need to set up rules for arguing then go ahead. Make sure that you let him have an opportunity to speak, without communication, a marriage cannot be on the same path, resentment can build and also feelings of loneliness. Sit down and communicate with your spouse what a wonderful difference it could make.